my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
she smelled like a LAN party
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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