idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Randomize