VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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