Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
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