so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
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