Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
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