she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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