Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Randomize
