lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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