Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
