haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
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