You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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