White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
