Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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