today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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