youre lurking in front of me
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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