i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
