and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
