Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize