the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Randomize
