so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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