Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
