I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
