Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
