They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Randomize
