physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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