dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
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