well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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