This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Randomize
