So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
You are a genius and a whore.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
