so that wasnt chicken after all
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Randomize
