Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
