Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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