That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
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His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize