Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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