Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
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I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
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I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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