i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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