i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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