You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Randomize
