The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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