i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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