id be glad to
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night