He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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