can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
