just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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