Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Dignity is for republicans.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Randomize
