Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
