Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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