yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Randomize
