What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
